Hello again: Back to me

 

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Wow, it has been months since my last post. Obviously I got hella carried away with other things, so my writings slowly disappeared into the background. No excuses are being made from where I stand, all I realize is how lost I have been not writing. This is my therapy, through my writings I connect with my inner thoughts and emotions. I literally ”check in” by writing about what I’m growing through. Because growth is a never ending process.

So what has been going on in my life? I have quit working where I worked at, I moved (again!) to a new city, and I started a small business. Other than that I have been social again, after two years of pretty much isolating myself from society. Spiritually I have also made some changes while my core is still the same. And I am still healing beautifully and coming more and more into my very own being. Lately I have been feeling an urge to start creating (again); painting, writing, dancing and singing. To express myself and my emotions in such a way that I materialize it into this reality. Because my emotions go up and down, I am sensitive to all that is around me, and everything that happens within me. My thoughts go by so fast at times, that my emotions cannot quite catch up, and when they do I just sit there kind of confused about why I am feeling this way. That is why it is so dear  to me that I am able to write it all down. This way I can see through the words that come out of me, what is going on and I slow down my thought process into something specific.

I just realized my last post was also about me being more social and active again out into the open. I must say this has been good but also challenging. As a sensitive soul I still am learning to balance myself between exchanging energy and re-energizing myself again alone. This is something I need to do in order to not feel drained. Lately I try to focus on my feelings and listen to them right away. I say ”no” more often and easier, I do things when I feel like doing them, and I take my ”me” time when needed. Still I find myself having ”off” days but that is just the path I guess. We cannot live a perfect life and we should just accept each day as a blessing AND another lesson. Because even the hard times are there to teach us. And I have come to find out that exactly those times gave me the most valuable life lessons in the end.

One thing I know is that this year, 2016, has been one hell of a ride until now! It has truly been an emotional rollercoaster with loss, sadness, happiness, new beginnings, goodbyes and what ever the hell else. What will come this coming five months of the year still remains a mystery to me, but I must say that what ever happened and will happen in the future, I am ready! I am extremely grateful for all of the experiences even though I sometimes feel so anxious, excited, sad or all over the place. At the end of the day it is worth it! Life to me still is an amazing journey, and I hope you feel the same.

 

 

 

Let me know what’s been up with you in the comments!

 

Love,
Surya

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Surya Tanya