You might have noticed I have been feeling a little poetic lately, and my writings were more poems than full out articles. The reason for that is not a particular one, just more the way I wanted to express I guess. Today I feel a need again to write a full article and this time I want to touch a subject many of us are not as open about: Therapy.
We all live life and so us living comes with a few scratches, burns and bruises generally speaking. It does not matter what age we are, where we grow up, what gender we and so on, sooner or later we are all faced with challenges. We deal with heartbreak, separation/divorce, child hood pain, abuse, trauma, sickness… I could go on but I think you get the picture. Often we hide our troubles and pains, thinking that the people around us do not want to hear about it. And maybe that is the case in a lot of circumstances. I mean, when I take a look at the people around me I would also say that they (and me included) are all so busy ”living our lives” that we tend to look over things that really matter. We just go go go, without ever taking a moment to really sit with what ever we are g(r)o(w)ing through at that moment. For me, it is no different really. I have a habit of running (away) through life without ever taking into consideration what I just went through. Therefore, my life is one big bundle of events summed up together in a hot ass mess. Sure, it does create the best stories, and it is pretty exciting to live out… BUT I need to take time to process it all because it goes by way too fast at times.
Now that I am on this journey of healing and transformation I noticed that I have always done things this way. And to really change, I need to change this way of handling things as well. In the past I have had therapy before, but because I was not all the way truthful with my self I couldn’t benefit completely from the results. I did not GO IN all the way. For therapy to work one must be READY, WILLING and ABLE to face their problems head on. These days (or weeks) I’ve started to become aware of the fact that I was not ready yet to really face my things. Yes, I have been talking about it for years, but to really face it, own it and accept it for what it is… that still is a big task. When your Facebook and Instagram timelines are all filled with beautiful memories and happy faces only, it is hard to stay truthful about how you are feeling. At least for me, it has been part of the reasons why I choose to be so open about what I am growing through.
For me personally I needed to stop with the fake bullshit. I was not happy. I did not have it all under control. Matter of fact; I did not know what the fuck I was doing, or who the fuck I even was to begin with. I don’t know who I am today, but I sure am somewhat closer to the real me. All I know is that I still need to work through my shit and that is why I started counseling again. This time more serious and ready to take on what ever comes my way. Time to really cut the crap. Time to get all the way real with my self. Time to release the old for once and for all and welcome the new lovingly!
As you might read through my blog certain things keep reappearing into my life and thus into my articles. I guess I am discovering layers underneath layers of deeper Truths, revealing to me the core of what I am or what I need to work on. The beauty of the struggle/journey is that it is never finished! I am still lovingly expanding. Thank you for taking your time to read this, and enabling me to share my story with you. Feel free to tell me yours in the comments or contact me through Facebook or Instagram!
Love and Blessings,